I mentioned last time that I’ve had an unusually hard time falling asleep — but I was still always managing to get to sleep by around 1:00 or 1:30. Things seem to have gotten worse for me as far as falling asleep goes, with the past two nights being around 4:00 a.m. before I’m able to get to sleep.

I’m not sure what the change is, except for the fact that I’m now at home and back from vacation. You would think that being at home would allow me to sleep better — but it seems it’s the opposite.

The problem is also that I wake up extra early, and then can’t fall back to sleep. This morning I was awake at around 7:00 a.m. (yes, after falling asleep at 4, it wasn’t very pleasant).

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I don’t ever remember being able to sleep well. Even when I was a little kid, I had trouble sleeping, and would often wake up in the night, unable to fall back to sleep. But lately, my sleeplessness has reached a whole new level.

I’m not sure what’s causing the sleeplessness, but it usually goes something like this. I lie in bed, almost asleep — until I get a strong sensation of movement that startles me completely out of my state of almost-sleep.

It’s strong enough that I actually lie in bed, muscles tensed, wondering if I did actually move — even though I know that I really didn’t. This is coupled with a second feeling, where I am actually sleeping, and then wake up because I’ve rolled over — and then get the sensation that I just keep going.

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